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Diary of a Madman

I have some things I'd love to show you

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And the angel of the lord came unto me, snatching me up from my place of slumber. And took me on high, and higher still until we moved to the spaces betwixt the air itself. And he brought me into a vast farmlands of our own midwest. And as we descended, cries of impending doom rose from the soil. One thousand, nay a million voices full of fear. And terror possesed me then. And I begged, "Angel of the Lord, what are these tortured screams?" And the angel said unto me, "These are the cries of the carrots, the cries of the carrots! You see, Reverend Maynard, tomorrow is harvest day and to them it is the holocaust." And I sprang from my slumber drenched in sweat like the tears of one million terrified brothers and roared, "Hear me now, I have seen the light! They have a consciousness, they have a life, they have a soul! Damn you! Let the rabbits wear glasses! Save our brothers!" Can I get an amen? Can I get a hallelujah? Thank you Jesus. Life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on life feeds on........ This is necessary. It was daylight when you woke up in your ditch. You looked up at your sky then. That made blue be your color. You had your knife there with you too. When you stood up there was goo all over your clothes. Your hands were sticky. You wiped them on your grass, so now your color was green. Oh Lord, why did everything always have to keep changing like this. You were already getting nervous again. Your head hurt and it rang when you stood up. Your head was almost empty. It always hurt you when you woke up like this. You crawled up out of your ditch onto your gravel road and began to walk, waiting for the rest of your mind to come back to you. You can see the car parked far down the road and you walked toward it. "If God is our Father," you thought, "then Satan must be our cousin." Why didn't anyone else understand these important things? You got to your car and tried all the doors. They were locked. It was a red car and it was new. There was an expensive leather camera case laying on the seat. Out across your field, you could see two tiny people walking by your woods. You began to walk towards them. Now red was your color and, of course, those little people out there were yours too.
=w= shoelaces, anti-perspirents, applebee's, arthur, arthur band-aids, australia, back to cool, back to school, bania u cygana, beds, bill hicks, bloated corpses, blood-sucking leeches, casualties, cheating death, checkers, cheese, clay aiken, converse, copacabana, crack maggots, crack monkies, crackheads, crematoriums, cute guys, dancing queen, dead babies, death, death threats, demonic cardshufflers, demonic possesions, disease, drive bys, drowning in trash cans, dying, eating babies, ebola, epidemics, excess chromosomes, exploitation, fastening seatbelts, fetuses, fire, flesh-eating beetles, ghosts, gorging souls, grinning skulls, guys in makeup, hanging people, hannibal lector, hate crime, hating aisd, hating school, herding people like cattle, hosing people down, human sacrifices, human testing, hunting people down, igloo brand coolers, ihop, inflicting pain, iron maiden videos, jazz hands, jello jigglers, k-mart meat, killing, luigi, madcap, maggots, making idle threats, mario, maury, mome raths, morphine, murder, my cats, my dogs, nightmare before christmas, old skool, one-armed monkies eating cupcakes, projectile vomiting, psychology, psychosomatics, reality tv, red dragon, repeating to fade, robert smith, serial killers, shelling peas, shimmying, short busses, silence of the lambs, skeletons, skulls wearing top hats, sleeping, slow reader, smart house, sonja g. hart, spirit fingers, spreading disease to others, stalkers, stalking people, starring uncle jesse, stem-cell cuisine, stephen king, tape, the 5th wheel, the cow that laughs, the good ol' days, the moon, the outback, the pain of others, the shining, the word nut, thinking of clever interests, threatening down syndrome, thrift stores, tool, tourniquet, toy story-like songs, trash digging, unbaptised infants, wal-mart meat, watching results from pain, william blake